More Geekdom

I am a Geek on multiple levels, and here’s more proof:
• I saw PEBCAK on a license plate and laughed.
• I got the joke when I saw a toddler named Clark wearing a Superman logo t-shirt.
• When watching an episode of Sleepy Hollow, I made the World’s Greatest Husband (WGH) stop and rewind. Two characters were discussing artifacts in a museum, and one called an item “…a gift from King Phillip II of Spain to Elizabeth I.” “Wait a minute…no effing way!” Phil was Mary I’s husband, and Mary imprisoned her younger half-sister Elizabeth. I doubt Phil was inclined to give Elizabeth a gift.
• Very esoteric: saw a license plate that said TK42One; had to think a moment because somewhere in my brain I knew the reference. I actually was telling a story to the WGH (one he hadn’t heard before; miracle of miracles), and I stopped mid-sentence. When I finally remembered where I heard it, I laughed a lot. Then I had to finish the story and ask the WGH if he caught the reference. When he couldn’t place it, I said, “Would it help if I added ‘Why aren’t you at your post?’?”


Speaking of Star Wars (I will give ample warning for spoilers)
Brian and I went to see Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens (VII) on Christmas Day, and as I said in my WordPress blog, answering the question: “What did you get really, really, really excited about? At the moment, I cannot think of anything. Not even Star Wars VII: The Force Awakens (I am cautiously optimistic about Disney films.) Isn’t that sad?”


I have a love/hate relationship with Disney films. I grew up watching animated features such as Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Cinderella, 101 Dalmatians, etc. I loved the live-action films such as Pollyanna, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, and Darby O’Gill and the Little People (with a singing Sean Connery). The combination of live-action and animation movies were fun too, such as Mary Poppins, Tron, and I saw Bedknobs and Broomsticks at a local drive-in.


When it comes to adaptations of literature, Disney either does phenomenal or terrible; I don’t see much in between. I personally enjoyed Popeye, and the comic-book reading WGH thought The Rocketeer was good, but I’m sure Victor Hugo is spinning in his grave over Disney’s animated musical adaption of The Hunchback of Notre Dame. I never will forgive Disney for what they did to the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy; and even though they started well with my beloved Chronicles of Narnia, adaptations of the second and third books lacked the magic of the first film, and the fourth seems to be in development hell.


So when Disney acquired Lucasfilm, I was happy that the final trilogy would be made, but I also was worried about the production quality – not the special effects or even the cast, who all are fantastic; but the story, script, and execution were my main concerns.


I had cause to worry.


When I reviewed Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (III; the acronym ROTS was not a good sign), I said, “Lucas has said that he will not make the third and final trilogy in this saga, and I agree he shouldn’t unless he wishes to apologize to his fans. The only apology I would accept is if Lucas would write the final trilogy stories, then leave screenwriting and directing to someone else…” I thought J. J. Abrams, after his successful re-boot of the original Star Trek series in film, was a good choice, as he obviously has the qualifications; however, I’m not sure if Episode VII is what Lucas envisioned.


Okay, here’s where the spoilers start
Please don’t misunderstand. VII is a good film, but when the WGH and I discussed the film on a road trip to the Dells, we both agreed that it had the same plot as IV: A New Hope: a cute little droid has information that a rebel group needs to fight the evil dictatorial government. Along the way, the droid meets a helpful person deserted on a desert planet, who teams up with an unlikely ally; and they share adventures that include incredible flying through the galaxy, meeting with rogues, and an intergalactic bar of dubious clientele. Finally the good rebels must battle a planet-sized weapon (or in this case, a planet turned into a weapon) in order to survive to fight another day.


The casting was fantastic, but with the exception of Ford and Fisher (that woman still turns in one helluva performance!), I felt most of the cast were underused. For example:


Max von Sydow, whom I know for his roles as villains, is only in the movie for a few shining moments before his character is killed. I think the late Christopher Lee had more screen time in ROTS, and Peter Cushing – an actor of similar experience and caliber when he starred in IV – most certainly had a larger role as Grand Moff Tarkin.


Lupita Nyong’o is an Academy Award-winning actress of considerable skill and talent, plus she’s beautiful beyond belief; and Abrams has her voicing a CGI character.


While Andy Serkis is the definitive CGI/motion capture actor since his work with Peter Jackson, his character is confined to an oversized throne and an undersized part and isn’t very convincing as a powerful bad guy.


Of course, the tiniest role goes to my personal favorite: Mark Hamill (who thirty-six years after I fell in love with his tukhus still makes my fantasy list). Unfortunately he is relegated to nothing more than a non-speaking cameo. The character’s name has more screen-time in the opening crawl than Hamill does in the entire film. In fact the scene to walk up the island where Skywalker is hiding takes more screen time (or as the WGH put it, “and she’s walking, and walking, and walking…” á la MST3K).


The newbies cast as protagonists all turned in excellent performances, and I can’t wait to see how their characters develop, but I was less convinced by those portraying the members of the First Order. Adam Driver, playing the grandson of and wannabe badass like Darth Vader, seems too stiff and restrained in his role as main antagonist Kylo Ren (plus his ears and the expression on his mask-less face reminded me of one of my nephews). Domhnall Gleeson (son of the fabulously talented and handsome Brendan Gleeson), Gwendoline Christie, and all the others portraying officers and higher-ups in the First Order all seem too young to have climbed the chain-of-command so high, especially because Ren doesn’t seem to kill off the staff the way Vader did.


The similarities between VII and IV were so much that during the main lightsaber battle, both the WGH and I were wondering if someone was going to lose a hand. Mercifully no one did.


My score for VII is B-/C+. In the words of Wil Wheaton in “The Opening Night Excitation” episode of The Big Bang Theory, “I liked that more than I thought I would.” but remember that my expectations were low before I saw the film. I knew that I was going to miss the old 20th Century Fox logo and fanfare, but I was glad they didn’t replace it with the Disney castle logo and “When you wish upon a star” music because that would not have felt right from the start.


Am I going to see the rest of the sequel trilogy? Of course. The WGH and I will continue our Jewish-like Christmas tradition of having Chinese food for dinner and going to see Episode VIII in 2017. I’ll even go see the ancillary series that Disney has planned in their attempt to cash in on this cow for as much as they can. My love-hate relationship with them continues ad nauseum.


Just don’t get me started on Disney’s sucky novelizations and “Journey to The Force Awakens” crap.


Pog ma thoin!
-Lori


“I’m just afraid I’ll disappoint you.” – WGH, on his 2015 Christmas gifts for me
“Sweetheart, the only one who can disappoint me on Christmas Day is J. J. Abrams.” – Me